What makes a person truly beautiful?
Text: Proverbs 11:22
Hosts:
J. Kent Edwards
Vicki Hitzges
Nathan Norman
Narrator: Brian French
The CrossTalk Podcast is a production of CrossTalk Global, equipping biblical communicators, so every culture hears God’s voice. To find out more, or to support the work of this ministry please visit www.crosstalkglobal.org
Produced by Nathan James Norman/Untold Podcast Production
© 2026 CrossTalk Global
Brian: An ever growing amount of money is being spent on our physical beauty. Beauty products like skincare, color cosmetics, hair care and perfume have always been popular. But now new categories such as wellness, personal care and aesthetic treatments are creating additional growth opportunities. And global revenues in this area are forecasted to increase from 600 billion to 858 billion by 2033. But there is still more. People are not only enhancing their existing bodies, they are also transforming them. In addition to non invasive treatments like Botox and fillers, more and more people are choosing cosmetic surgeries such as breast augmentation, liposuction and eyelid surgery. That's why the global cosmetic surgery market, valued at 83 billion in 2024, is projected to grow to over 195 billion by 2033. And did I mention glamour accessories like clothing, shoes and handbags. The global fashion industry now exceeds 3 trillion annually and keeps growing. There's no doubt that the world is obsessed with physical beauty. And while it's not wrong for people to want to look their best, the question King Solomon would ask us is, is that enough? If someone's main goal is to reshape their body until they resemble Kendall Jenner in appearance, scent and style, what have they truly accomplished? And should we be concerned? Join Kent Edwards, Nathan Norman and Vicki Hitchkiss as they explore King Solomon's wisdom regarding our worldwide obsession with body image in Proverbs, chapter 11, verse 13. Welcome to CrossTalk, a Christian podcast whose goal is for us to encourage each other to not only increase our knowledge of the Bible, but to take the next step beyond information into transformation. Our goal is to bring the Bible to life, into all our lives. I'm Brian French. Today, Dr. Kent Edwards, Vicki Hitchkiss and Nathan Norman continue their discussion in the Book of Proverbs. If you have a Bible handy, turn to Proverbs, chapter 11, verse 13. As we join their discussion.
Kent: Brian painted quite a picture of the enormous amount of money being spent today on appearance. Have you seen evidence of that?
Nathan: Oh, my goodness. So just yesterday my wife and I were driving in New Jersey and on the highway we saw on one side there was a big billboard. As Brian said in his introduction, it said breast reduction surgery. Right? This big, huge billboard on all that. And then a little ways down there, breast enhancement surgery. You know, I didn't see a billboard for contentment.
Kent: Well, I live in Southern California and it's amazing as we drive around our area, how many buildings we pass that have advertised surgical options. And there is a huge shopping complex not too far from US Called Fashion Island. If you walk around that mammoth area and look at the stores around, there is no question people are interested in what they look like. The shops, the opportunities to spend money on appearance, they seem to be everywhere.
Nathan: So when I was in New York as a kid, I go to the dentist. Great teeth, great teeth, great teeth. I go to California and I'm getting my teeth checked out and they're like, ooh, yeah, we're gonna have to like, break your jaw and reset your teeth and everything.
Kent: What?
Nathan: And you're gonna wire your mouth shut for like two weeks and you're gonna drink through a straw. And it was just awful. And because we gotta change this, like, tooth thing. And I'm like, okay, wait, where. How bad are my teeth now? You know, on an A to F scale, they're like, well, a minus, but this will get you to A plus. I'm like, no way. I'm not drinking through a straw for two weeks. Tens of thousands of dollars just to have, you know, A plus teeth. And then I go to Michigan and they're like, oh, you got great teeth. And I' I can't live here.
Vicki: Michigan is home. Yeah, yeah.
Kent: And I think in the business world, you dress and look for success, right?
Nathan: Absolutely. Yeah.
Kent: You don't come in with tattered jeans and a T shirt. You come in looking like you're a winner. And the money that it costs is significant. And that's not wrong. There's absolutely nothing wrong with looking your best. But Solomon, the wisest man who ever lived, gave us a warning in Proverbs 11:13.
Vicki: He said, Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.
Kent: Wow, that's a strongly worded proverb, isn't it?
Nathan: What an image.
Vicki: Yeah, it's like the one that is colloquial, which is, don't put lipstick on a pig.
Nathan: Oh, yeah.
Kent: Oh, yeah, yeah.
Nathan: Absolutely. Perfect.
Kent: I just wonder. He's obviously communicating this, intending to have strong emotional response, right?
Vicki: Yes.
Kent: He wants to grab our attention. He wants to stir emotion. Why? Why do you think that is?
Nathan: Well, first of all, the emotion it gets is like, what a waste. I mean, pigs are disgusting and they smell. If you've ever been around them. You know, you take the kids to the petting zoo and they get to the pig area and they go, o, it smells so bad. You would never in your right mind think, oh, you know what? This smelly, disgusting animal. I am going to take something incredibly valuable and put it on this animal. Right. You just never would.
Kent: I think the emotion is brought up here because Solomon wants to gain our attention. This is really important. This is something that we need to be aware of or. Yeah. Or the course of our life could take a very bad turn. So one of the reasons everyone remembers this proverb is because Solomon wanted us to. He's clearly trying to get our attention with that single line, sarcastic and offensive metaphor that he's using. So let's dig into what Solomon is talking about here, because I think there's a lot we don't understand. He says, like a gold ring. A gold ring. Like today, gold rings were worn as jewelry. So they were a sign of beauty, a sign of wealth. In fact, the ring would typically be put in the. Inserted in the person's right nostril and it would hang down until it touched the top of her. The right side of her lip. That's where it was supposed to be worn. And it was put there intentionally so people would notice. I find it interesting, in Ezekiel 16, God spoke in metaphor of his love for Israel and did it with a gold ring.
Nathan: He says, I adorned you with jewelry. I put bracelets on your arms and a necklace around your neck, and I put a ring on your nose, earrings on your ears and a beautiful crown on your head. So you were adorned with gold and silver and costly embroidered cloth.
Kent: There's nothing wrong with wearing jewelry. And in fact, it's always been popular in many parts of the world to have a nose ring. And at least in North America now I'm seeing it increasingly. Do you?
Vicki: Yes, especially in, I would call it, weird places. I consider a nose ring a weird place or.
Kent: Well, a nose ring doesn't make much sense to me, especially if you've got a cold. But who am I? If it looks good, it looks good. If a woman in Solomon's day wanted to dress up for a glamorous event or a romantic date, she would always put on her gold nose ring. A sign of sophistication, wealth and status. But one would never put a gold ring into a pig's nose, would they?
Nathan: No, of course not. I mean, first of all, they're smelly, disgusting animals and they root around in all kinds of things, their own filth. So why would you put something valuable to an animal that is really disgusting and gross? Right. You just wouldn't do that on the face of it. But the Hebrews viewed pigs as unclean animals. So it's not just that they're physically disgusting. They are spiritually unfit and unclean. So they don't even Keep them.
Kent: That's morally wrong. Yeah, to have a pig. But to have a pig and then put a gold ring in its nose, that doesn't speak of sophistication, doesn't speak of elegance. That's an offense to the ring. But I learned something in Myanmar that made this metaphor even stronger.
Nathan: We've heard this story before, but it's worth hearing again, just for all my giggles, because I'm not mature enough to hear it.
Kent: Our students, as we were talking with them, I asked them if any of them had ever recently climbed a tree. We were talking about Zacchaeus and how he climbed a tree in the Gospels and asked them if they had ever climbed a tree. And almost everywhere in the world I mentioned that, people say, the adults say, no, I haven't climbed a tree for decades, but only when I was a kid. But here, all the men raised their hands and I'm going, why were you climbing a tree? And they explained, well, you know, we go on missions, trips out of the city, and we go into the rural areas to spread the gospel. When you go out there, you know, there's not a lot of toilet facilities, and sometimes you have to go behind a tree somewhere to get some privacy and do your business. But. But you can never, you can stand up and do your business, but you can never squat and do your business. Because if you have bowel movement outside, the pigs will instantly smell it and they will attack you to eat your dung. There is no way you can squat and do your business. They had to literally climb a tree, hang off the edge of a branch, let their excrement hit the ground, and wait for the pigs to finish eating it before they could. Before they could come down and continue their ministry. So that's the image. In the ancient world, pigs are so disgusting, so awful, you would never, never put a gold ring into a pig snout.
Vicki: And putting a gold ring in that snout is not going to dress it up. It's not going to make it more attractive.
Kent: But notice Solomon says, like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion. Well, not surprisingly, the word beautiful in the Bible refers to a woman's form or outward appearance. And the Bible says that beauty is not wrong. In fact, it's a God given gift. We see that with Abigail in 1 Samuel 25, don't we?
Vicki: Abigail is described as an intelligent and beautiful woman.
Kent: Yeah.
Vicki: And Esther, lovely figure and was beautiful.
Kent: And Job at the end of his life.
Nathan: Yeah, Job. It says, the Lord blessed the latter part of Job's life. And he had three daughters. Nowhere in all the land were found women as beautiful as Job's daughters.
Kent: Yeah. So clearly there's nothing wrong with beauty in the Bible. And Solomon knew that. You remember he also wrote the Song of Solomon, right?
Nathan: Pretty explicit.
Kent: Pretty explicit. He liked beauty. But who cares about beauty? Solomon says in this proverb, if a woman lacks discretion, beauty is just a gold ring in a pig's snout. If a woman lacks discretion. What does that mean? What does that word discretion mean when
Vicki: I hear that word? It's not about plastic surgery, the way we started this show, necessarily. It's the way she acts. It's the way she presents herself. It's the way she clothes herself. If a woman dresses the word I have in my head, slutty, she has no discretion. If she talks rough, she has no discretion. If. If she's demanding, chances are she has no discretion. A lovely woman has a way about her that people admire. She can be in control, but she does it in a way that people respect her. That's a woman with discretion.
Kent: Yeah. And in addition to that, this person not only knows how to dress and how to act in public, but the word discretion means good judgment.
Vicki: Yes.
Kent: Good judgment. In all of life, they're able to make good decisions. We see that. We mentioned Abigail earlier, but, Nathan, do you remember the discretion that Abigail exercised this beautiful woman exercised in her dealings with David?
Nathan: Oh, yeah. She put herself in harm's way to prevent David from committing murder, mass slaughter, and in doing so, was able to help David maintain his moral dignity.
Kent: Yeah. Her husband Nabal, had grossly insulted David. And David was furious and was running down to getting ready to attack him. Murder him, perhaps. And Abigail got on the road and stopped him. And Vicki, do you remember how, after she gave her words of wisdom, David responded to her?
Vicki: Yes. He praised her. He said word for word, he said, praise be to the Lord, the God of Israel, who has sent you today to meet me. May you be blessed for your good judgment and for keeping me from bloodshed this day and from avenging myself with my own hands.
Kent: No, he praised her and decided to marry her, by the way, after Nabal's death, because she showed good judgment. And that phrase, good judgment, is the same word that's used by Solomon as discretion. She was a wise woman who knew how to act in a difficult situation. Discretion is the ability to make thoughtful, sensible God honoring decisions in every element of life. So when Solomon says, like a gold ring and a pig snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion, who do you think his primary audience is?
Nathan: Well, he's talking to young men, largely.
Kent: Sure. Why do you say that?
Nathan: Oh, because he starts off the whole proverbs, my son, listen to my wisdom. Right.
Kent: And have you ever known guys to make bad decisions based on external form and beauty?
Vicki: Never. Never.
Nathan: Yeah, obviously exclusively.
Kent: Someone catches their eye, and sometimes the eye is the only part that is making a decision about, should I get serious as women do. I want to be with her.
Nathan: When I was in high school, I started. I was a sophomore and there was a junior. Ha ha. So that showed some interest in me. And she was attractive, and she turned out to be crazy. I won't go into all of it. I mean, like, really, it was bonkers, really crazy. And I'll tell stories later, some other podcast. But she was just bonkers and everything. And I remember I was, like, frustrated with the whole thing. It was my first girlfriend, and I was talking to my neighbor, and I was like, well, I learned my lesson, and I'm not going to look just at beauty and everything. And he was older. He was like, senior in high school at the time. And I said, I'm just not going to do that. I'm not going to make this mistake again. And he put his arm on my shoulder and looked at me. He said, yes, you will. Because the allure of beauty is so strong, it often just cancels out reasonable thinking.
Kent: Well, isn't that why advertisements use supermodels? Sure, because physical beauty has an amazing effect on people. And Solomon knows that, and he's warning us. Solomon here is warning young men not to marry a woman simply because of how she looks. Because appearances can be deceiving, and in this case, appearances can be destructive. A beautiful woman who lacks moral judgment is like a pig with a gold ring, grotesque and repulsive. He's saying, do not go near her, no matter how beautiful she looks. As a Jew, you'd rather die than eat a pig. And so Solomon's saying, why you should also choose death over marrying an amoral woman, a woman who makes consistently bad decisions in life. Why? What are the consequences of marrying someone who has no discernment? How does that affect you?
Nathan: Count the ways, right? I mean, what ways can a person go morally south? They could be financial, right? The person could have no discretion financially, and they spend and spend and overspend to the point of financial ruin. You can have a great job, and your spouse, husband or wife can foolishly spend you out of existence.
Vicki: If the person is foolish, the way they treat other people when You're a couple and your spouse is an angry person, a hostile person that will affect you the rest of your life. The way you feel about yourself, the way you feel about other people, the way you're viewed in the community. You have to be careful who you marry.
Nathan: Yeah. And this is the person that's going to be raising your kids with you if you have kids.
Vicki: Exactly. And giving them their values.
Nathan: So now if you're looking at this and you understand, okay, my husband, my wife is angry or selfish or mean spirited or whatever. Now what do you have to do if you want to try and raise your kids right? You have to undercut your spouse to tell your kids. Well, that's what dad does. I had a good friend, he was a deacon in the church that I grew up in. And he, he said that his mother, like, he started using curse words and his mother would say, no, those are the words that daddy uses. Right. But I mean, just think about that. You have to now make a break in your child to say, yes, that's your father and you love him and you respect him, but he's wrong. Right. That's hard. That's really hard.
Kent: Yeah, it is. Well. And there's a reason the Bible says when we get married, we become one flesh. Right. So that person that we marry is an extension of ourselves. And so if they're healthy and they're positive, we are stronger. And if they're not, we are injured. And that's what Solomon wants us to know. By the way, would you ever give Solomon's good advice to your daughter?
Nathan: Absolutely.
Vicki: Sure.
Nathan: Listen, if we watch Beauty and the Beast, we all know about Gaston, Right. For our listeners who might not be familiar with that Disney movie, you got Gaston. He's got a whole musical number, and frankly, it's the best one in the whole movie. But he's got this musical number about how great he is and how wonderful he is and all the women want him and he's arrogant and, and misogynistic and hateful at the end of the day. Absolutely. The same advice goes for women.
Kent: No, no. Young men are especially susceptible to the temptation of beauty. But it goes to anyone who is looking at having a permanent relationship with someone else. So how do we avoid falling into this trap? Solomon says, you make this mistake and you are in big trouble. Irreversible trouble. What guidance would you give to someone who was falling in lust with a beautiful woman or man?
Vicki: Well, first of all, don't think that's gonna last. On Facebook, they show these older people I'm 89 now, or I died, but I used to be. And then they take you back, and you see them in their 20s or 30s, and they were gorgeous, and then you see them and you think, oh, wow, that didn't last long.
Kent: That didn't last. No, that didn't last.
Nathan: No, that's true. I think also, trying to convince a person in the moment, especially when they're hopped up on emotion and hormones, it's not effective. But I do think if you can get them to take a breather, a break, just get out of this situation and whether it's they're dating the person, get away from them for a weekend, get away from them for a week or two weeks, or go on a trip, a missions trip, preferably just to get some perspective on the kind of person that they are and the kind of person that they don't want to be around, really. I think that can help a lot.
Vicki: Well, I hope so. I think if somebody really wants to marry somebody because of their looks, they just don't have the right values. When I was a little girl, my mother used to tell me about falling in love with my father. And she would tell me over and over and over, she said. I looked across the cafeteria. They met in college, and I saw your father. And it just hit me. That is a man of character. And so I grew up wanting a man of character. And that mattered to me. It just mattered to me because that's what my mother taught me. Get a man of character.
Kent: My wife and I have been married. Well, this summer, it'll be 45 years. I had the privilege of meeting her in high school.
Vicki: Oh, wow.
Kent: And one of the things that I found fascinating was we met and we started to do ministry together. It was an intervarsity group in the local secular high school. And my senior year, I was president and she was vice president. So we had to have meetings, just make sure that, you know, everything went well. And they were great excuses to spend time together.
Nathan: We called it dating when I was that age. But, you know, whatever.
Kent: That was the euphemism I preferred. After high school, we started a youth group in our local church, and we ran that together. And what I found is when you do ministry with someone, over time, you get to know their character, you get to know their values. And I have found that to be just an excellent way of confirmation for my wife, Nola, to get to know me better. Who am I for me to get to know her better? But I found doing ministry together an excellent way to understand yeah, she's a pretty woman, but she's a woman of character, too. And I found it fascinating that just before our wedding, the secret was revealed to me. When my wife told me that my fiance told me that her mother had done some checking up on my family, she asked as many people as she could in the evangelical community, tell me about the Edwards. Who are they? What kind of values do they have? And frankly, I was impressed and glad that they did, because I want many people to have the right to observe this relationship. And is there confirmation from others that this is a woman of character, a woman of discernment?
Nathan: Yeah, that's another good piece of advice to anyone who's dating. And I mean, it can be kids, it can be adults. Confirmation. Who is really in support of this relationship? Who in your life thinks very highly of you as a couple? Or do you have someone in your life who can give you honest feedback about the way this relationship looks right now? Because I think the pervading narrative is romantic love. And if they're gonna say we're not allowed to be together, it's just because they're against love and all. If you have parents who are living, talk to your parents, right? If you have friends, talk to your friends. If you have a pastor who observes you, talk to your pastor, right? Not that they have the final say on everything, but just that you can say, what kind of relationship is this? Do you have any observations on how healthy it is or unhealthy areas that can be really, really helpful? It was helpful for me.
Kent: Yeah. The Greeks tell the ancient story of how, after a decade of military failures, their army finally discovered a way to destroy the city of Troy. The Greeks surprised Troy one day by burning their camps and sailing away. And the Trojans were thrilled to watch their enemies retreat. But then they discovered that they had left behind a large, beautiful wooden horse. A captured Greek soldier convinced them that this wooden horse was an offering to the Greek goddess Athena to ensure their safe journey home. And the Trojans celebrated their good fortune, brought the horse into the city gates, and began to rejoice in their victory. What they didn't realize, however, was that that beautiful horse was hollow and hidden. Danger lurked inside. And when night fell, some Greek soldiers hiding inside slipped out, killed the sentries, opened the city gates so the Greek army, which returned under the COVID of darkness, could enter. And the city of Troy was looted, and the war was over, just as Troy was defeated. Because they failed to examine what was inside the horse, many men and women have made irreversible mistakes in life by falling for beautiful people who shine like gold on the outside but are immoral pigs on the inside. Paul mentions in 2 Corinthians 11 that Satan masquerades as an angel of light, and now you see how he uses the same tactic with attractive people to carry out his plans. Fancy clothes and attractive bodies attract us like moths to a flame. But if we ignore a person's character, we can make a tragic, irreversible mistake. And let's listen to Solomon. Why settle for a gold ring in a pig's snout when you can have a woman or a man with character, with discretion?
Brian: What makes a potential mate truly attractive? They live wisely. He or she lives with discretion. I trust that today's discussion of God's Word has been helpful and serves as an encouragement to not just be hearers of the Word, but doers Together, let's bring God's Word to life, to our lives. This week, the crosstalk podcast is a production of crosstalk Global, equipping biblical communicators so every culture hears God's voice. To find out more about this educational nonprofit organization, please visit www.crosstalkglobal.org. crosstalk is training leaders in Bucharest, Moldova, Cuba, Kenya, and Kansas over the next few weeks help us train the next generation of biblical communicators. All you have to do is click Donate in the show notes and make a donation of any size. You can also support this show by rating it on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you find it. Be sure to listen next Friday as we continue to learn from God's wisdom in the Book of Proverbs. You won't want to miss it.
Nathan: Ah, I like this one. What's better than a gold ring and a pig snout? Nothing, of course. By the way, Vicki, I. I have a program that I run the audio through and then it does like a transcript. And whenever I see your name, you know I have to edit it, right? And it's not the easiest thing to edit, but I edit your name and I can say, hey, change every instance, but every single time your last name is mentioned, the transcript always changes it differently. So I can't say, okay, change every. Because it's like, I don't know, it's really. Yeah. Anyways, all I say is, you are utterly unique, like a diamond in the rough.
Vicki: Oh, I know that.
Kent: Yeah.
Vicki: And Esther, lovely figure and was beautiful.
Kent: And Job, at the end of his
Nathan: life, Job was also lovely and beautiful.
Kent: No, sorry.